Thursday 10th April 1980

At the Red Welly youth club again. 
Both the club and the Rio Grande had been shut for Easter.
I didnt mind too much that they had been shut, but tonight was a Thursday.
And Julie didn't seem to have noticed that the club was open on Thursdays as well as Sundays. 
Or else she couldn't come on Thursdays for some reason.

I knew it was daft, but even though I had only seen her four times, and we had barely spoken to each other, it was already the case that I only wanted to go if she was going to be there. 
But... I told myself... "I can still have a laugh with my mates and talk about what we plan to do the weekend".  
And so I went to the club.

It's around 8pm. 
I'm playing pool with JR and Witt. But my mind is elsewhere.
In the background. Fern Kinney starts to play again.
"Walked into my life.. taking over.. and it's beautiful."
I recall that this was playing the first time I saw Julie. And that makes me feel worse.
And then?
Julie walks into the pool room.
Wow. 
Of course I play it cool. I dont even speak to her.
But I feel that she has just made my night.
Little did I realise what was about to come....  

Later and the second set of music is over.
It's time for the club meeting.
We all sit in the music room - which doubles as the meeting room. The lights are turned on.
I dont recall what is talked about. The lights are bright. Julie isnt in the room.
After ten minutes or so the meeting is over.
The lights go out again.
Someone - Norm I think - starts playing some rock music.
It's something I'm not keen on so I decide to go back to the pool room.

Suddenly she is standing there - right in front of me.
I'm looking right into her gorgeous, lively face.
She tells me that, since coming to the youth club she has decided to dump her current boyfriend. 
But that he is persistent. It has been hard to do. Now she has done it. This very night.
She has done it before. But he kind of pestered her to go back with him.
I tell her I understand. Whereas in truth, I'm not sure why she is telling me this or what I'm supposed to do.
Then she asks me, straight out: "Will I walk her home?"  
To make sure that her ex- doesnt collar her this time.
Umm... Will I?
Wow. Yes. But of course I just say, "Oh, yeah, alright, sure".
"Now? "
There is almost another hour before the club shuts.
But she wants to go now.
"OK", I say again.
I go into the pool room.
Suddenly life, each step, the light, it all feels vague. 
A little unreal. Like I'm drunk.
I tell JR that I am going. That I am walking Julie home. He is green with envy.
Back out of the pool room and Julie is ready to go.
We walk down the stairs together.
We leave the building. 
It's dark. It's a bit chilly. I don't even know where she lives.  
We walk off together. Having barely spoke more than two or three sentences to each other before. Having spent no time together alone before. 
Wow, I can't believe she is here now. 
By my side.
God knows what we do talk about, as we walk along. Whatever sounds coolest. Both of us.
There's no sign of her ex.
We walk on.
Time passes.
Distance passes too.
I dont want it to. This is too wonderful to end.
We go past the old library. Past the catholic church. The British Legion.
And all too soon here we are. At her house. A nice semi near the top end of Hurst Lane.
We stop.
Both fidget a little.
Talk a little.
Then she says she has to go in.
"Are you going to the Rio tomorrow?", I ask.
"Maybe", she answers. "I'm not sure..."
Someone walks past with their dog.
"Uh... Was it shut last week?" she asks.
"Yeah". I shrug. "For easter".
We say one or two other things. Nothing important.
I look at Julie. 
She looks at me. 
We are about two feet apart from each other. Maybe a little less.
"Dont I get a kiss for walking you home", I say. 
I can't believe I say it. 
But I do.
She smiles. Seems to become smaller, softer. More gorgeous. Nervous slight laugh. There is a bit of a flick of her head and hair.
"Oh, yeah. I suppose so".
O God!
I lean toward her, and we kiss.
Just briefly.
Lips on lips.
We pull back apart. Also just briefly.
I move a little closer to her. And she moves those last few inches towards me.
I put my arms around her. Then feel submerged under a huge wave of inner relief as she does the same to me.
I have a strange, hollow feeling as I understand that my arms draw her in. Her denim scrunches up against me, I feel the metal buttons. Her arms are now inside my coat and around my lower back.
We kiss again but longer.
Lips and then more than just lips.
And again.
Then, without letting go, embraced, we speak. But now much quieter. Much softer.
"Shall I come and pick you up. Tomorrow. Take you to the Rio?".
"Yeah".
I kiss her again.
"Oh, fuckin hell", I laugh, "You feel nice!"
She smiles. White teeth. Her face lights up.
"So do you", she says.
A few minutes more. More of the same.
Arrange tomorrow.
Talk about nothing.
Walk her slowly up the path to the door.
Another kiss or two.
"I've got to go".
"OK".
Hands held, say goodbye and then let go.  
She goes in. The door shuts. I walk away.
All I can think is "Fuckin' hell. Fuckin' hell. Fuckin' hell".
How do I feel now?
Isnt THIS what being ALIVE really feels like?
I think things over. Slowly. Quickly. Over and over. All the walk home.
Home. Home and to bed.
With the most unbelievable sense of wonder and delight...